I think (and have experienced in my own marriage) that two realities can co-exist in the same place. Just because my perception doesn't match my husband's, it doesn't negate either of them. I, too, have also offered roles within my organization while my husband built his own company, and felt unsupported and unseen (frustrating, building a business is like having a new baby!)
My best advice (from learned experience) is to over communicate during this transition. Sit down 1:1 and really sort out the family values, the disconnect, and the potential solution so you both feel purposeful and seen. Hope this helps :)
