We area husband and wife team. Same situation - it was his before it was ours. We run the business together. You said she doesn't have the same entrepreneurial drive, which is a good thing. I would turn that on its head... your combined effort is what drives household income, right? Her having a drive to deliver will increase revenue, something that benefits you both. Side by side revenue comparisons of before and after she came into the business will illustrate whether the job she is doing in that role is effective. Including her as a business decision maker may influence her behavior on the job - food for thought. Until very recently, we had an admin who did customer contact - phones, emails, texts, social media pings. It didn't work out as the business evolved because the business ground work I laid out in a job description/business practices plan. In that description, it outlined deliverables, timelines, expectations. She left. Now I'm doing it all and that job description has informed me of company goals/practices.
Since you don't have an outside person, include her in formulating a job description (as though you were going to hire someone else), and ask her about timing/deliverables. For example, customer calls -- how should they be logged, what is our target response time, what is the quote/invoice/follow up procedure. Form a blueprint of the business and scale it from ideal to minimum (e.g., Ideal: every phone call will be answered personally. Minimum: all calls will be answered within 24 hours). In this exercise, take personalities out and form roles and responsibilities for the business - not for you and her, for your company.
In our company, he is “the boss” in the field and I am “the boss” of the office. He has the final word and responsibility about what happens in the field and I have the final word and responsibility about what happens in the office. It's about roles and responsibilities. If you have timelines and deliverables mapped out, you will each know how you are or not living up to your agreed upon goals for the company.
It’s always a work in progress, and there's a lot here. It has taken a lot of effort on my part, and we leaned into the Michael Gerber model of running a business, and not have the business run you. We also have parameters - once the laptop is closed and the table is set for dinner, we don’t talk about work. We have breakfast out once a week and talk about the business only. Not day to day stuff - more this is what went well this past week and this is what needs work, where are we with long term goals, etc.
My advice to you? Sit down and talk about how the two of you want to run the business. Figure out who is suited to do what and what is the expected timeline. Keep coming back to process and procedures. I can't emphasize this enough: Process and procedures - formulated together and documented. Emphasis on the team, and how WE are going to make $$ together. Set a revenue goals and a vacation to be paid for with some of that increased revenue = working toward a common goal. The company's success is also her success, and that only really works if she is involved in the blueprint - what is going to be done by when. Works for us. Best of luck!